The Jigsaw Puzzle of Anessa’s Life

Anessa is a cute and adorable seven years old girl. Right now, she is in standard one in one of the schools in Bentong, Pahang. When she entered the primary school earlier this year, she knew that it would be such a great time for her. Well...easy! New friends, new environment, new teachers, new school bag, new shoes. Simply to say, from top to bottom, everything was new!. At school, her favorite subject is the Islamic study and her passion for that subject is so obvious.

Though it is very tiring for her, she had to attend to two types of educational systems- one in the morning which is a normal primary school and the other one in the afternoon, which is called as ‘KAFA’ (basically a class for the studies of Qur’an and also other related subjects on Islam aimed to cater the needs of Muslim students at school).

Anessa or Nessa as her mum called her is a very young, jovial and lively little girl with such a bright future. However she has a dilemma in which I doubt a girl at that age would ever think beyond that. At school, she was taught and exposed to read the Qur’an (from the basic definitely) and then the teachers there would be teaching so many Dua’ (Supplication) so that she may put it into practice in her life. At home, she always reads the supplication in Arabic out loud though sometimes you can hardly understand her ‘version’ of Arabic. Even her little sister keeps imitating her and it is such a lovely and amusing things when they do that together =)

Anyway, for a girl like her, that’s not important. What more important is, she is able to memorize them. In fact, she was even taught how to pray by the teachers and of course she had to learn it gradually, step by step, little by little, like a baby step. Anessa loves her mum and dad. Not to forget her little child which is a year younger than her and also her baby sister Adeeba. At night, there goes the revision and homework time. The fact that both of her parents are working sometimes brings difficulties for Little Nessa. Well..at night they must be tired and her Mum has to take care of the baby also. When Nesssa hears the Azan(Muslims call to prayer) on television, she knows that it is already time for her to pray. She is very excited because at school the teachers had taught her how to pray and for Muslims it is a duty for them to perform it. She asked her Mum to lead the prayer and recite the Qur’anic verses . Yet, her Mum feels tired because of the baby etc. Other times, her mum would make an excuse like she is on a menstrual cycle etc. For us, we know that such excuses cannot be accepted at all because Islam cannot tolerate when it comes to performing solat (prayer). Yet, the Mum never pay heed to the commandment of her Creator. What more, to the needs of a proper religious education for her child. Same goes to the father!

Poor little Nessa, she finds it weird because at school, the teachers told her that it is a must for Muslims to pray but here at home, she’s never taught to pray. To be exact, her Mum and dad never pray at all. Once, she asked her mum,

“Mum, why is it that I’ve never seen dad praying? Does he pray?”

Like a thunder struck right into her heart, she answered sheepishly while her face started to turn red,

“Of course he does my dear. It just that he does not pray in front of you”.

Deep inside, her mum knows that she has lied to her little daughter. The truth is, her husband never prayed at all. The only time he prays is during the ‘eid only. Oh yes, ONE DAY ONLY out of 365 days all over the year!.
When little Nessa asked her dad to help her with her Arabic subject (which is VERY-VERY BASIC) or sometimes subject on Islam, he refuses to help. He would say that he’s tired, but deep inside he knows that he has zero knowledge on that particular subject. Little Nessa might not understand this at her age now, but surely she can sense that there’s something wrong in her family.

“Why is it that at home it is so different than school?” The thought comes to her mind.

In real life she might be jumping, giggling with a cheerful and animated personality, but beyond the comprehension of a girl at that age, we know that she is actually experiencing such a great dilemma. A Muslim dilemma if you want to call it. Worst, this dilemma is not caused by her little innocent self; rather it is because of her parents at the first place. Being Muslim because they were born as Muslims and not because they want to be Muslims.

This story is not a made up one, rather it is a true story. I know Nessa and I love her just like I love all my nieces and all other kids around me. When I look at Nessa, I feel so sad thinking about her future. I keep thinking by myself…would she end up being just like her mum and her dad who never pay heed of their duties as Muslims or would she end up being such a great Muslimah to guide her parents back to Islam. Definitely I pray for the latter one. I pray that her mum and dad would be given guidance by Allah so that they would open their eyes and contemplate on what is waiting ahead for their child. Suddenly I remember what my teacher used to tell us in class, “Islam is to be and to do!”. Surely it does make sense. It’s not about having your name stated as ‘MUSLIM’ in your identity card or so on, rather it’s about how you carry that ‘title’. Deep in my heart I know that Nessa is trying to prove it though it can be argued how much she can comprehend that.

Allahu A’lam(Allah Knows Best)